Why Living Abroad Feels Like Being in Kindergarten Again (And Why That’s OK)

Let’s be honest. Living abroad sounds glamorous…until you find yourself crying in a supermarket because you can’t find baking soda, and your phone translator keeps calling it "soda for cooking explosion."

Whether you’re fresh off the plane or five years deep into your new country, there are days when you feel like a wide-eyed toddler learning everything from scratch — language, social rules, how to correctly separate your recycling. It’s exhausting. And humbling.

I remember my first week living in France. I was determined to blend in: striped shirt, stylish scarf, and determined "bonjour" energy. But things went sideways fast when I confidently called my future father-in-law a bastard (=“salaud”) instead of what I wanted to say: a simple “hello” (=“salut”).

He blinked. I blinked. Nervous laughter ensued.

The Identity Curveball

If you were competent, articulate, and independent back home, being abroad can really shake your sense of self.

Simple things — like opening a bank account or understanding a detailed work email — can make you feel like you’ve lost 50 IQ points. You’re still you, but now you stumble over words and second-guess every interaction. It’s disorienting, even embarrassing at times.

But here's the thing: being uncomfortable doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It means you’re doing something brave.

Why This Stage Matters

This "kindergarten phase" is actually where the magic happens. It’s where you stretch, grow, and learn to laugh at yourself a little more. It’s where you build fortitude.

Because one day, you’ll navigate a tricky situation — in another language, no less — and realize, “Hey, I did that.”

The messiness? That’s proof you’re evolving.

A Reminder for the Rough Days

So, if you’re feeling overwhelmed, lost, or like a confused extra in a movie you didn’t audition for — just take a breath and remember:

You’re not alone. You’re not failing. You’re becoming.

This life you’ve chosen — with all its beauty and absurdity — is shaping you in ways you can’t yet see. You’re gaining new ways to see the world, and more importantly, yourself.

One Thing All Expats Learn (Eventually)

It’s okay to not have it all figured out. It’s okay to need help. It’s okay to laugh at the mistakes and cry over the little wins.

Because living abroad isn’t about getting it perfect. It’s about growing through it.

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